A tale of States.

Man.., these state bifercation has blown the wits off me. I dont feel anything less than 5vi class se tez, I myself dont know how many states in does India as such have now. The only thing at risk here, if not anything else is the software called SAP (Software of Andhra Pradesh). What would happend to the 40K engineers who come out freshers with 3 working years experience from the engineering colleges there ?

After the split in the north, the split has finally re-hit the south before being hit a few decades. The software engineer in me, still cries for SAP. Should we split the company itself into SRS (Software of Rayalseema) and SAT (Software at Telengana) and so on ? If not anything else, I am also concerned about the desis settled in the US of A, They were asked to learn the language Telugu even before trying their hands on Microsoft of Java products. I hope they dont ask for a re-partition at onsite based on the location that they belong to now. Cheez! Take a break.

The cause of all this ? Mr. KCR, on his live-to-diet hunger strike, resulted in having a different state for as less as 7 lakhs people. Wow, If its only 7 lakhs that required to have a state, we may as well have as many states that we want in our own very metopolitan cities. i.e CST State, Thane State and Vasai State (in Mumbai) or Maybe a BTM Layout State, Malleshwaram State and of course, Vidhana Soudha state (i.e coz of few lakhs visiting the office everyday).

All in all, I am working my way out! Thats towards re-naming india. I am going on a sub-way hunger strike, I shall not eat anything else than Subs for having my country of states have a peculiar name from india to UUSI (Un-united states of India) or Should i also call it as United States of East ?

Whatever the outcome is, I am damn sure that, just like KCR, i am gonna shed some weight and you're contribution of a sub, would help me only stronger for the cause.!! Join me in saying, WE WANT UNITED STATES OF INDIA, JAI HO SUB!!

Commercialization, yet again...

Where was i this long? i'd just gone missing., so missing that i even googled to search myself, the reply came back saying.., no results found.... Cheez.!!


I was working and working and working, like fasting between meals :) Off late, i had a terrific project, and this was OUT OF THE BOX thinking. hmm.. you'd seem to be quite amazed, out of the box thinking.., and its been assigned to this moron ? huh..., stop that lousy thoughts, its not gonna get you or me anywhere.


The project came from a mega millionaire organization. The organization which has a wood and log behind it and is preceded with many like holly, bolly, kolly, tolly and many more which i am not even aware of. The post recession, when the actors and actresses started charging less for movies and films, came another dilemma how would you earn a bit (a lot) more.


As i'd always been working as a consultant, they approached me. Consultants have a unique mind, quite too much for the OUT OF THE BOX thinking., and then as it is, we were talking about an idiot box, but this time with an unique and strange idea. I was thrown open the entire ocean to think, but at the end of it all, all they needed was money.



Me, being an Internet freak, and even more into watching cricket., decided to implement an idea called the ticker on the movie screens... huh, anything great ?? nope, not at all. But, the copy cat me had an idea of google's ad sense behind the back of my mind. Strangely, but not amazingly, Aamir was my mentor, and hence decided to pick one of his movie Ghajini, for a start. Being a pilot project, its implementation would have had me just going ahead testing the idea..., so then, i started with analysis and requirement gathering and when almost done with the waterfall model design, decided to implement my project. If not for the entire movie, would have the ticker running for the highlighted scenes of the movies. Luckily, to grab people's attention to the pilot project, I'd also included some puppet shows, political statements & whatever i could do it make it a success.

This is how it went... I'd a database of all the advertisements available in the market and let my program pickup the advertisement based on the scene.

Scene 1 : Aamir on the fight with Ghajini's gundaas, the ticker shows " Gandhiji's Anti violence message..."

Marvayega mera ad sense.. :), But still did not give up hope....

Scene 2: Aamir gets down from his private jet and there's a little ticker rolling down the screen saying... "When was the last time, that you did something for the first time... Emirates, Keep Flying"
Good... Its working to an extent...

I did not want to watch the entire movie, because, i'd already spoiled my new year day, going for this movie. Hence, put the movie on a Fast Fwd mode, but amazingly, my code worked in the fast forward mode too... JLM (Just Like Me).

Scene 3: When Asin says, "There is no network coverage, Dabba phone hai...." and the advertisement below pops... " For ~hello~ better ~hello~ network coverage ~hello~, Switch to~hello~ Tata Indicom". Aamir wouldn't have been too amused with it, nor Aircel was, That's because, they'd close relations with "AIR"

Scene 4: The police officer locates Aamir's place to find the map of mumbai... Gosh, this is where google really showed its skills.... "TRY GOOGLE MAPS, Easy and Convenient..." it said. I was speechless, Who wont be ?

Scene 5: Asin is hiding in her new house and the gundaas searching for her all around and just about to leave the house when Asin's mobile rings.... and the bottom of the screen pops.. "Choose your Ringtone Wisely... The Zoo Zoo feeding the crocodiles.... " that was a killer one.. ;)

In between all these scenes., there was ads of Red Label, Domex, Benz, Converting autos to CNG etc being played...., but the last of the least was...

When Aamir, hits our Ghajini with the Iron Rod.... The Message displayed.... " Natraj Pencils.... Aur yeh raha Sixer...., out of the boundary " followed by Sachin saying.... " Boost is the secret of my energy...... Dhoni Joins along..... O U R - E N E R G Y "

Till my project gets approved...!

Luv,
Dhinu!

The Unconditional "WHERE" clause..!

Disclaimer :- All readers reading this blog are suggested to have a crash course on SQL. Contact SQL Star, Ref : dineshdiwakar-blog for a 75% discount.!!

It blew me off.. i never knew the analaytic me would be such puffed when it comes to writing a simple silly query of my life.. The query was supposed to look like this..

Q:> select top 1 from ALL_BRIDES_DB

But i made some joins viz...

INNER JOIN :
Q:> inner joined my family,

OUTER JOIN:
Q:> agreed to outer join my friends.

SELF JOIN:
Q:> agreed to SELF JOIN TO THE BRIDES FAMILY, SELF UNJOIN from boose, smoke, and mouth watching :'( From neta to abi neta, who doesn't make promises ?

CROSS JOIN:
Q:> cross joined again to tell the world, i am straight (NOT Sec 377 Comptabile)...

and there was a Where condition.... (as suggested by me).
Q:> Where BRIDESDADS_BANK_AC > SLUMDOG_MILLIONAIRE
Q:> AND CAR_OF_BRIDE atleast a ('BMW','HONDA') OR NOTHING LESS THAN A ('SUV')
Q:> AND KG_OF_GOLD > Count(Sachin's Century) in kgs.

When this query was executed, As expected, the results were to be counted on the fingers, But there was a subquery written by the result achieved...

Q:> SELECT GROOM WHOSE FATHER IS ('BIRLA','TATA','RELIANCE','D GANG',
..... AND THE LIST WENT ON...

But unlike other query editors, It gave a list of 'CLOSE MATCHES', those brides were all in ghoongat, cover their head with saree tip...

But now that i had almost found an answer to my reply to the TOP 1 BRIDE MINUS THE BANK BALANCES AND THE CAR, were there many more conditions added by the INNER JOINED PEOPLE....

a) Groom's Mother - She should be able to do household work too
Q:> AND BRIDE ALSO 'A DIGNIFIED COOK'

b) Groom's 1 Relative.
Q:> AND BRIDE HAS BOTH HER PARENTS

c) Groom's 2nd Relative.
Q:> AND BRIDE HAS A GOVERNMENT JOB

That saga went on as they were sitting in a circle and passed many rounds of conditions, while i walked out...

I was sure that in this digital age, where marriages are not made in heaven, but happens over the internet, I was finding it even difficult to do a peer to peer network connection.... Blah.., the query that i executed would have not only returned ZERO results, but would also returned an error message... "TOO MANY CONDITIONS.... Your Query has been suspended..."

In the meantime, my friends has already discussed that, he is a idiot programmer., doesn't know to fine tune his query.! Such a loser..

On the other hand, i was already preparing another query..
Q:> Select OPTIONS from EASY_SUICIDE
Q:> WHERE PAINFUL = NULL


Till I find another query,

Luv,
Dhinu

Color Dilemma!!

These Colors are so great, it help visualise. I can only relate to blood and danger when it comes to the color red and green to nature and pakistani flag color. The firm that i work says, nothing here has got shades of grey, everything is either black or white! Thankfully, i am no colour blind too.

Just incase, you happend to list down your favourite colors. Black and White had a prejudice. i'm seriously sick of the differentiation. Last week, I was chatting with one of my friend and he said, he hates MONDAY, i asked him, who loves it anyways, asks the students too, they too wont like it unless its a public holiday! My ABCD (Amercian born confused Desi's) are even more smarter, they'd actually made a racial remark by hating mondays and also by calling the dark ones there as a MONDAY!.

Cool, Just in case, if this was nothing, I was differentiated in my own country, here its not black and white, but its north and south. Unfortunately, All southies are Madrasis, regardless of being from Kerala, Karnataka, AP or Tamil Nadu. I read comments of few fellow bloggers, who also divided the cricket team into south and north. Wow, Racism at its best, But between them too, I hung out in the shades of grey. I am a mumbaikar, I am south indian for the northies and Northy for the southies. I feel like our own DHOBI KA KUTTA.. NA GHAR KA... NA GHAT KA.

In between all these, i proposed to my GF. Shoot, it all came trembling down, when she had to speak about color too..., Seems like, its not the issue with her, but with her dad. Her dad wants a white groom! aah.., he wants a white groom, not a fair one, I'm still in for it i thought!. This issue had to be fixed, did not seem to be quite be a challenge anyways. That is because, I'd seen John Abraham's Ad for Garnier to become WHITE, and unintentionally in a BLACK squeeze tube.

Down the line, I seen many changes in me. Everything in the process of getting to the WHITE from the BLACK. The Deo Spray, The Pen from Black to Blue. Not to tell about the drinks that i used to have., That too changed from the likes of DSP Blacks and Whisky to WHITE RUM, GINN and VODKA (if not white, they looked plain) The Black Tea N Black Coffee (my favourite) to the regular milked tea and coffee :(, All for a cause..!

Man, the only irony that stands still at the moment is..., I'm only in the shades of grey, Nothing ever changed from the black to white, in the meantime, the GF found a white for herself and the after effects of transformation left me totally grey.

See ya!!

Luv,
Dhinu!

After a long time...

After a long time is because, i dont see myself having posted any blogs off late., that maybe coz, i did not have much to tell the world or even otherwise, all work no play has made this jack a dull boy! So today (to-die) i am forcefully taking some time off from work to blog out something.., as u read., If its on my mind, its in here....

What happens, when your mind is empty ? (Choose the appropriate)
a) An Ideal Mind is the devils workshop
b) Your Mind is never empty
c) A treat to destiny.

Basically, I would go with none of the above options and rather answer this as "You've got a beautiful mind". When your mind is at the least, you've just got a beautiful mind. And probably thats the reason why we love kids and ya, we love puppies too..

First things first.., I found a red nosed guy, found amusing walked upto him and asked.., Dude., wats up wid ur nose., Why is it so red ? Naturally gifted kya ? he replied, Bike chalata hoon... I was like... SO ?? Helmet Pehanta hoon.... Haan.., Compulsary hai.... Tho ?? abbe saale... sabb sunega kya ?? Helmet ka flap bhi daltha hoon... Uff..... Bechara red nosed reindeer.... I thought!!!

One fine day, the socialist in me popped out and said to my collegues who drives and rides "Doston.., We try not to honk tommorrow.., It would decrease the noise pollution... Waise bhi.. Tr. Margaret ne sikaya tha... ONE GOOD DEED A DAY, MAKES A GOOD DAY.. " Cool.., great initiative.. said one of them, I was wider by chest for 1/2 an inch (after a lot of effort) and the next day, one driver comes up and say.., I'm sorry dudes and dudiya, i cudn't just hold it.. HOLD WHAT ?? abt the honks yaar..., itne saare potholes hai.., I cudn't just stop honking at it.. :)

The other day, my friends were all rushing to the medical shop to get a N95. N95 medicals mein.. Zamana kaafi raftaar mein hai... i thought!! The next day, there was a state get 2gether and a N95 union was made... Maaf karna... that happend in Kerala. Now, the last among the least i observed was..., a person with a bad breath would have to tell u the most of secrets in the world.

C ya.,

Luv/Dhinu!

Good Samaritan

It was the friday evening and i started my ride towards home. Coming out from a campus which caters to more than 6000 employees. The guy riding from past me was a guy on a yahama Rx 100, which makes much more than screeching noise and lets outs enough smoke too.

The guy was wearing a racer jacket, which had logos of all different bigges right from AMD to Vodafone. This guy buzzed past me and i had a "Luck go dude..." look towards him, Almost 3 kms away from my office is a railway crossing and around 500 metres before that is a turn towards my destination. This guy, raced far ahead of me and by the time i reached the turning was this person waiting right in between the road.

It caught me by surprise and also for the little fact that the racer kid was standing between the road. He was giving someone a lift. Huh, this guy only managed to stop in between, so that makes me a winner if only this was a race.., I thought. This guy was following the same road that i was following and eventually, i had to wait at the railway crossing for the train to pass. Now, this guy broke the line and went straight ahead, even after the traffic police stopping him in between. The traffic police too would have fallen for his attitude.., i thought! But eventually, this person went all the way ahead, and held the person behind him and another kid and helped them cross the railway crossing and came back to the lane which was ment for crossing the railway gate.

Not for the first time, but i had judged a book by the cover (the looks, the bike etc). Well, I really wanted to pat him and say, You've done a great job buddy. But he was a racer, once the gates opened, he raced off and he was nowhere in visibility when i crossed over.!! But, Dude, incase even by mistake you land up on my blog, "Thank You" for being a human!! I was talking about taking off from ITPL and this incident happend at Hoodi Railway crossing!

============================================

How much do you have to pay for a doctor's visit ? And what if he is a specalist with around 30 years of experience ? Well, nothing less than Rs. 300 - Rs. 500. But things weren't such with a doctor at named Dr. Srinivasa Reddy, Bangalore. His fees is Rs. 20 or Rs.10 (as the article at DNA times said). He is running a dispensary from the last 30 years at a not so common place at Bangalore. He chose that place because, that was the place where most of the construction labourers lived at one point of time. The dispensary is only a 20 x 20 block. They did not have access to any hospitals close by and the doctor himself had to be till a nearby bus stop and later almost 15-20 minutes by foot. He also says, that its just been last year that he could really afford a motor cycle.

http://www.dnaindia.com/bangalore/report_all-in-the-name-of-humanity_1270026
Catch the report here.

Just 50 meters away from this small dispensary was a good big looking hospital of 3 floors, where the doctors doesn't even know what he is treating a patient for.....

Well well well, It makes me feel good to say that there are still human left on this earth, which makes this place much more lively!!

Thank you doctor, and its indeed., all in the name of humanity.

Till next time,
Dinesh!

Mom... How would you like to see me ?

The 4th std kid is confused on seeing their parents run and hence decided to apply thought to what does he do when he grows up. He has enough time during his summer vacation and hence one fine Sunday afternoon, after mom's shopping & hopping at home and after dad's weekly maintenance schedule which resulted "SUCCESS", the boy took all the courage to ask... " Dad, Mom.. What are you guys upto?, at time you even forget that i am around... I wanted to know, what career should i take up when i grow up... "

Both parents had a tough look, It was bigger than "ONE TIGHT SLAP" on MTV. Looking at the kids age., mom thought of making a joke of it..., " Beta.., Kuch bhi ho..... Housewife matt banna. S/w Engg tho bilkul hi matt banna.." Dad giggled and joined in saying... " Beta, Agar s/w engg bann bhi jaaye... tho weekends mein kaam nahi karna.." The kid started getting a little aggressive.

"Mom, do i have an option ? " asked the kid..
" How about a doctor ? ", That's an option for sure, but you see.., You are too scared to see blood., Moreover, we are anti-violence supporters. We can stand no blood.

Dad had quite an unique idea... " How about a lawyer ?? " for which mom replied.. " There would be blackmailing and at one point or the other, you may have to lie & cheat in pressure..." its no good option!!

"How about a building engineer ? " asked the son.. Thats a fair profession to take up. Mom objected, " I dont want to see my son in the sun, burning it out there., look ahead 20 years from now., you wont be able to cope up with the weather and moreover its going to be so bad outside. "

The kid now started getting irritated, come on mom and dad, i just asked for a simple little question, and you guys are upto discussing all possible negatives of a profession, So we better stop answering the question to what i use, rather, i refine the question to something like this... "How do you think, i should live when i grow up? ". There was a sparkle in the mom's eyes and had already made up the list.

1. Live in a huge bungalow, covered by security, servants and drivers.
2. Have a respecting job, which even have people saluting you when you walk in.
3. The best of all, You have to be creative in all the projects/assignment that you take up.
(the boy is having so many things going in his mind now..., and moreover when bollywood movies are at stake).
4. Dad adds.. The job should be less quantitatively, but quite a competitive one.

Dad was about to add some more, when the kid exclaims... " Major at the army... ". Mom had a turn down on her face and then the kid suddenly realised, oh... we are the non-violent ones...

Looking at the curiosity of the kid..., Dad decided to remain mum, mom let the kid think and he suddenly comes up with a bright idea..., Dad, I wish to be a DON., What ?? Yea, an underworld don!! Are you crazy ? dad exclaimed...

Dad & mom, please dont sallow your words, look at the points that you listed above.., I feel the Don is the right match, moreover, what i would have to do is, sit somewhere in the middle east and give directions to my business partners (suparis)., And then you see SRK, Don ko pakadna mushkil hi nahi.. Naa mumkin hai...

Beta, aisa nahi kehti.. Don isn't a good man.., remember, we are anti-violent, We need no Khoon-Karaba...

"Okay dad... How about a Neta ? " Asked the kid... Dad was almost covering his face with the hanky., God, where is my kid getting all these ideas from ? You... You..., (pointing towards his wife).

"It wasn't me..., I've not told him anything like that, he must have kept track of the recent elections maybe.. " Said the mom. Beta, Neta is not good too.... He is often in between many chaos of the public, He is sometimes involved in bribes and crimes.. We are still anti-violent.

Gosh, I should not have brought up the topic itself. I am off to play. Parents looked stunned at each other for whatever the kid expelled. In other way, they also started imagining what if he really did what he just said. Both parents were done and out and either of them having no clue as to what to respond when the kid comes back, he comes back with lot of joy and expression...

Dad, I've found out something, which is respecting, demanding and competitive., Dad was stunned..., so was mom... " What the heck would that be.... "

Dad.., "I Want to be a cricketer in India..., "

Why specifically India ???...

Till next time..!!

The art of saying a "NO"

How often do we come across times in our life, when we expect a YES and it turns out to be a NO. A NO is so so disappointing. Some are even life taking ones. There's a little difference between us and the western. We although try to be western in everyday life, can't really get over this simple factor. We Indians can never say a NO or atleast have a royal way of saying a NO. There is a pick from Ronan Keating's song... " You say it best..., when you say nothing at all.." How more royally can you ask someone to "S H U T U P".

A nod of the head in left to right and right to left means a NO for us, and thats what we hate to hear. We as humans long to see your head travelling from top to bot and bot to top. Right from indian players appealing to the umpires to proposing a gal. Off late, i had received a case, which was definitely out of my area, but not living with the art of saying a NO, i went out to other areas to seek information and replied the person with a satisfactory answer. Similiar was not the response when i requested some information from my onsite counter parts. It was a BLUNT NO from their end.

Luckily, my manager was a person who has spend a decade at onsite and explained me the condition and asked me not to feed bad about it. It seems its not a real issue. For them, there is a line drawn and said, this is my limit and the other part doesn't belong to me. Now, I'm into much more dilemma, thats because i have to often mix my work and personal life together. Thats happening accidentally. I am allowed to work from home and by default some things at home needs my attention even when i am working.


Well Well, There are even unique ways of saying a NO., remember the pepsi ad off late ? " I CAN"T HEAR YOU!!..." Or probably another way of saying a NO is what our Netas do at the Assembly.. A SHORT NAP!! Which one do you prefer ???

As i in the office (Where, I can yawn without any bothering....), I'm almost saying a NOOOOOO now!!

Luv,
Dhinu!!!

The Sunflower Boy!!!

Surya had it in his eyes, the charm, the innocence of a good teen boy!. Perhaps, he was too attached to flowers to take up sunflower selling as an option!. This little teenager was gods gift to the village, if not for any other good deeds, for the occupation that he had. He was a sunflower vendor.

Nobody knew where did Surya come from, Whenever asked to him, where he came from? he had only to talk about paddy fields that he crossed, the streams and at the end pointed towards the mountain to say, he crossed over. The boy had more than a vendor touch to him. He greeted all his customer with a smile and wish, at the age of non-customer-centric age, he did atleast thank all his customers!! The daily earnings helped him meet both ends, but he had a vision of being a bigger businessman. But, for the village that he was in, the sunflowers were brought only by children and few adults, that too, only on special occasions.

His luck changed on a cloudy day, It was a the village King's anniversary. Surya made the first and best bouquet of his life. He designed the bouquet so well that admist all the gifts, the king picked up Surya's bouquet. This not only changed the fortune of his business, but also gave enough reason for another shopkeepers to allow surya put a stall in front of his shop.

The sun flower boy had the sun shining on his fate. But everyone was still eager to know, where did surya come from and what did he do before coming to this tiny village ? All that anyone could manage to gather was the same piece of information that he had to share by pointing towards the mountains. He was never known as Surya anymore. He was called the SUNFLOWER BOY!. His shop being right in the centre of the village, he was more socially involved in the village activities.

There was no common matter in the village which must have not passed the Sunflower Boy's ears. On one such occasion, there was a decision to be taken on letting the nearby dam water flow through the village. The villagers were happy as it would benefit the crop, but none really bothering much towards the risk which was involved. Surya, at once took a note of the low-lying area in the village and recommended it to the king. During the rains, the low lying area was almost washed out, without the dam being let open, one could have imagined the scenario of these area with the dam water let open.

Surya, now not only became a good businessman, but earned respect for his thought too. The villagers felt blessed to be having a person like him around. Any serious concerns used to be definitely given a thought and the best of solution came out through surya. He was a gem in all aspects. In a general village meeting, Surya was awarded by the king for all his good work. As a general question, a king asked him to be his advisor.

Surya was in a state of shock, He wasn't educated and did not know what is the pious duty of an advisor to the king. Hence he replied,

"Your Majesty., Thank you for the offer.., But your subject needs a better and educated advisor unlike me..".

King then asked, "What would you then like to be? "

Surya : "I'd always been selling sunflowers and always wish to do so, until i'm good health wise".

Villagers felt, Surya was perfect fit for the job, but his conscience said, he wasn't. Surya asked many questions to himself., Why can't i be the right one? is it because he wasn't really fit for the job or was it the fear of erring at job during difficult circumstances ? He always thought, Its only the fear thats stopping him saving his village. Due to the intensity of the job, many advisor to the king had been replaced on and off., but Surya still continued giving his piece of advises whenever needed.

Years and years passed with this trend, Although Surya was not the official advisor, he helped everyone with the possible way that he could. His days were almost ending, Surya did not leave behind a family or anyone. Although, he was too tired to run his sunflower shop, the king did not leave surya unattended. He was looked after by the kings servants. It was finally days for him to join the majority. The last rites were conducted with all the villagers present. He had not left a will to anybody, nor did he want any wishes to be fulfilled.., but the villagers did leave a sunflower everyday at his tomb... Indeed a SUNFLOWER for a SUNFLOWER BOY!!!

Sea-Link, Connecting the upper Mumbai..

June 30th, A dream come true for almost every mumbaikars. The site which was a shooting point for almost every mumbai based movie. We could have seen the progression from RBGG (Raju Ban gaya Gentleman) to JTYJN (Jaane Tu ya Jaane na). Mumbai has almost become NOKIA (Connecting people)., But to let u know.. "Nothing on this earth comes for free..."

This is an amazing stretch, But this is the stretch without halt, You cannot halt on the bridge! Amazingly the toll is Rs. 50 / side, which is quite fine looking at the mumbai traffic and moreover when the bridge boasts of having covering the 40 minutes (8 kms) stretch in 7 minutes (5.6 Kms). The bridge is however not open to 2 wheelers, 3 wheelers and trucks. So in short, only cars and buses can take this path.

Lets calculate a little, based on a small car that we may use for travelling.
Alto (Mileage of Avg 16 Km/litre, 5.6 x 2 = 11.2 kms (two ways) which is less than 1 lt of petrol, hardly, Rs. 40 twoways + Rs. 100 2 way toll makes it Rs. 140. Monthly Expense Approx Rs. 3080)

Alto (Mileage of Avg 16 Km/litre, 8x 2 = 16 kms (two ways) which equal to 1 lt of petrol, hardly, Rs. 48 twoways + Rs. 0 toll makes it Rs. 48. Monthly Expense Rs. 1056.)

All that you can do is save time at the expense of Rs. 2000, which could be used for partying, again spent from pocket.

Look from the other prespective, the governments eye. They expect a 1,20,000 vehicles using this road daily, Out of which they'd be expecting a crowd of 80K to be using this road daily, which makes it average 80K x 50 = Rs. 4000K. That makes it 40 Lakhs daily. From the above calculations, seems like Goverment would be able to recover the total expindeture in less than 12 years apart from maintenance of the bridge.

With the fuel price already hiked by Rs. 4 and bikers not allowed on the bridge, i hope our government manages to pull it out or else, it would be once again the government coming down hard on the pockets of us tax payers. Meanwhile, there is something to cheer about for Mr. Rajendra Chauhan. He was the first and hopefully the last biker to be using the bridge., Catch him up here.. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VOn68B5Tqjc&feature=channel

In the meanwhile, This blog owner has started looking out for a 2nd hand car in mumbai or a rich gal from mumbai, who can gift the blog owner a car and also afford to have Rs. 150 (for toll and fuel) in her wallet..

Do wave to me if you see me on the bridge of fortune....

"Moon" soon

Well well, just imagine me off the daily traffic, where food is always in the air and me too in the air, just like as if i was in the moon. All the fools in the world would be astronauts. Dont be amused, I am not pointing out that someday we'll all be the intellectual ones., but just pointing fingers at the weather.

"Rain Rain go away.. " was the ryhme that we learnt in our kintergarden days, do we really want to recite that at the need of the hour ? I am sure that would soon be boycotted from the KG. We also learnt about faith of a little boy, who went to the temple with an umbrella when people gathered to pray for the rain.

Seems like rain gods aren't really amused with the faith of the little boy or they're still asleep. Imagine without rains...
a) No more "Tap tap barsa paani.., Baarish mein aag lagaai."
b) Mumbai local trains running ON TIME, no more display of 00:00 hours on the display board at the railway stations.
c) All the morons who never bathed for the last 8 months, would be off bath for 12 more months.
d) Chennai wouldn't need a boat to travel to office.

Now, those that i would personally miss...
a) Woh kaske pakadthi thi..... With the rains and lightning, used to often receive hugs from the beside.
b) Cutting chai with rain dripping.., it is just amazing...
c) Can't share umbrella with the gal next door....
d) It was a good enough reason to ask the gal sitting beside me in the office... "So.., did you get wet today?? "

Gods, Please ignore what little Johnny has to do on a rainy day, Rain Rain please dont go to spain. Rain rain please come and drip us wet.... if not for what i wrote in the first para... atleast for the second.....

Luv...,
A bin badal ke barsaat...

T20 Masala

"Cameo!!" is the word that we closely relate to the T20 Game. This game came as a welcome gift to many youngsters. The world knew little Rohit sharma, who transformed himself from the crowd of mumbai trains to a cosy BMW and not the least, the little Niel O Brian of Ireland to show some attitude on the field.

Cameo is a little different in the world of T20, thats because almost everyone plays a cameo in this particular form of the game. The cameo here comes in the form of the "First Ball ka Captain", "Miss Bollywood and the likes of Deepika-Saif promoting their upcoming film Love Aaj Kal. I was just wondering, how could they do it ahead of a important game against England, which India was fighting for survial!! I was wondering, Were the producers of Love Aaj Kal sponsoring the event, or cricket sponsoring the movie.

With the cricket effecting sleep of almost 2/3rd Indians, We're in for a good business. But then, our tigers are still working it out there.!! Our own dish washer (Dhoni) has started being a pain. Thats because he changed his batting position from No.5-6 to No. 3, Where he feels he needs to play like Rahul Dravid and was almost playing a test inning knock in the world of T20.

Ya, its easy to sit down in a drawing room and give offline commentry, but then our own shers are having their shares coming from expensive match fees and commercials.

Chao, back to the match now,

Rgds
D!

Phir meri kahani yaad aayi...!!

Yup!.. Phir meri kahani yaad aayi.., because it was June 1st week and i called up to speak to my niece last night. She was all geared up for the first day at school after summer vacation. The little gal had discovered a lot. The LOT means, she has learnt to spell out small words from the previous reciting of ABCD's and many many more rhymes. She has learnt to paint (Car Tyres in Yellow and Sun in Blue) She had gone for vacations to her grand ma's place and most of all, her biggest achievement was that she learned to operate mom's new cell phone!.

This gets me back to my school days, It used to be the first or second week of June and when rain is at its best. Like every other little one, Had to really make sure that atleast for the first day at school, the pencil box do contain pencil and eraser. If so, probably a sharpner too. Make sure that i know which floor does my classroom lie and so on. The first day after summer vacation is pretty busy day.


Had i not had some friends like John, There would not have been much people to match shoulders to see who has grown up during the summer vacation. Big boys had even become bigger., and few bigger boys have left the school. Thankfully, there was no IPL then to discuss the best team and the pre-post match analysis between the young cricket rookies.

The first day at school is pretty confusing, It usually started off like with a hurry, thats because, for the entire of the last 2 months, you slept till 9am and then, all of a sudden, you are asked to wake up atleast by 6am. As I was in a boarding school for most part of my school life, I had a strict time table to follow. Usually, its the new school uniform, which used to get wet at some or the other part (due to rain). Our "Hi" and "Hello" would get over the pervious day as we had to be present at the boarding a day before the school started.

The best of the lot is the first 5 minutes of the class. Thats when you know who is gonna be your class teacher for the next 1 year. There used to be a cheer or a growl when the class teacher walks in. The first 5 mins of this 8-9 periods are surprising on day 1 as there would be different teachers coming in and would know which teacher is assigned to us for particular subjects.

All i could guess was, our PT sir is going to be Sir Thomas, Scout is again going to be another Sir Thomas and drawing teacher, Miss Pramila.., no matter in which standard i am!. There was uniformity maintained for all these subjects. :-)

All in all, my little gave me so much to think., Good were those days, now i can only think and long for those days, because its all the same everyday, unless i switch between firms.

Till next time,
Dhinu!

On the lighter side.....

Hmm... This post should have come a long back..., Probably soon after Mumbai Indians were shown the door off IPL, Indian Paisa League.

The city that i have been staying off late was Bangalore!! So unintentionally Bangalore becomes "My team" but, there was a catch. I was staying at a PG and we were 8 in all, Different people across the country and each picked up one, Someone else picked up Mumbai Indians and I was given option between, DC, KKR and Rajasthan Royals.!! I decided to go with Deccan Chargers.

But, now with Mumbai Indians being out of tournament, DC & Bangalore was quite Inn. I decided not to be beaten up or atleast not being stared by the local public at Bangalore, hence never sported a DC T.shirt., But got more used to taking up effort to speak kannada (god knows how it sounded.) Too good, especially when you are using the local BMTC (Bangalore Metropolitan Transport Corporation) buses for commuting to and fro...

Wanted to be a little more open to the "Namma Bengaluru" crowd and this stint took place when i got into the bus from the home to office. To the conductor who tried keeping the crowd away from the door.... "Erudu ITPL..." I said..., Conductor quickly collected Rs. 20 and handed me 2 tickets to ITPL. Wow, the day 1 was amazing, with 1 word spoken out. The next day, it was the same time and hence the same bus and the same conductor, So this time.. me being alone, I showed my voting finger and said ITPL.., Yup!! that was 1 ITPL., The conductor, still gave me a ticket and took Rs. 10 from me and flashed his front 4 teeth !!!

So now that we'd turned friendly.., i asked him " Ennu Saar... Ennu Samachara ?? " (How r u ? or for the dudes, Wass up..) for which he replied something which i barely could understand, but hopefully must have said that he is fine. I smiled back. What if he must have said that his wife is not well, Mother in Law expired last week, and had a loss at his part time business and i replied him by smiling back ?? I would have been a dead meat!!

As the time and road passed by, the man, would have been expecting me to ask for few more questions and discuss something else (maybe the elections) or any damn thing on this earth. He wasn't having much of crowd then and the bus was running empty!! He came back and asked me something in Kannada, now for the champ that i was in kannada, I replied him... " Kannada Swalpa Swalpa Gothu....." (I know a little little kannada...).

"Hindi ??..." I asked him.. He said, Hindi Gotilla saar... "English..??", Gotilla saar.. I had a "I am sorry dude" kinda face towards him... which he accepted quite gleefully. He was aware of the fact that there are many outsiders who come to Bangalore and this guy could be one among them. The next day, me caught in the same bus and same conductor. For the guy he was, He really had a part time business and he handed me a Rs. 5 ticket and charged me only Rs. 8. Gosh isn't that business ? I scratch u're back and u scratch my ass !!

Now, that was allowed in Bangalore, they've a mutual understanding between the bus conductors, If am short of a rupee or so, he may not as well give me a ticket, but can travel with whatever i have!! He would never be running out of pocket money for a peg or two at the end of the day. He had been quite happy trying his business stunt on me and even happy that i never objected to it. The fact was, I could not ask about whats happening in kannada and the guy did not know english or hindi.

He, made it clear about giving extra service to his newly discovered client, Used to walk up often and pass a grin, would often shout out "ITPLaaa" and all that a bus conductor can do to make his client happy. It was one fine day that, I was caught dosing in the bus (Thanks to IPL matches). Our business man came upto me and tried to speak to me, but u know, action speak louder than words and i interpretted his actions as "What ??". He went over and over with his action of "What ??" and when i observed outside, it was a place that i never have been to before and i looked back at him quite inquistively....

He finally managed some english and asked... " Where are you upping...?" I had a (:) look on my face. What did he mean ?? From the surrounding i knew that i had missed the stop and he wanted to ask me where am i alighting ??... Hmm... for the english that he spoke, he seemed to be funny, but then, wasn't that a proper english ? he must have asked, Where are you gonna UP your BOTT.

Cheers...
Dhinu!!

IPL Belongs to the BLUES...

Flashback.. IPL 1.
Rajasthan Royal, being penalised for not spending the qouta of amount on the player's auctions, unargueably, the worst looking team were on No. 8 for everyone, Went to win the honour. Thanks to a legend called Shane Warne. The blues take it away. I was a little disappointed as i missed the finals coz i was travelling.

IPL 2.
Deccan Chargers and Royal Challengers, both at the bottom of the table from IPL 1, makes it to the top, Thanks to dedication from a legend called Gilchrist and the bank balance of Mr. Mallaya, for spending the most on KP. This IPL too clearly belonged to the blues. Say it just a fate or the numerology, Deccan Chargers changed their jersey color and they are now amazingly on the top., the title holders of IPL 2.

IPL 3. (A Vision).
Browse through the table, the No. 7 & 8 belongs to Mumbai and Kolkatta respectively. IPL still belongs to the blue. Mumbai (for the jersey color) is gonna bounce back and be on the top of the list and gonna defeat Kolkatta knight riders (No.8) in the finals (the easiest opponent).

And guess what..., there is a little more irony adding to this. Next year, Mr. SRK would be performing at the closing ceremony, The reason, its the person from the runners-up team who would be putting their best leg forward (Katrina from Royal Challengers this time).

Well, My future's looking bright for the thought that i am putting!!! If not RED, its BLUE...

Lots of Luv, Dhinu!!

Daily funny moments....

Aah..! who doesn't like to have a funny moment going, atleast to make up a day, or if not to make up a day, Only to widen your lips and broaden your cheeks... :-)

Tryst with destiny, The funniest moment when you wake up is you thinking... "Shit.. where is this noice coming from ? where am i lost ?", its just that we dont realise where we are. The snoozing alarm on the cell phone, Thank You!!

When i ride to the office, the security, even though they see me every other day, do have an inquistive look., as if i am human bomb just about to explode. They dont even pass a smile till the time they are done with checking the vechile and the bag that i carry. Thanks to my looks!!

The parking lot has the same people working, but each and everyday, they wish to see my parking lot pass as well as closely inspect the Vechile No. and the Pass exipry date. Makes me feel guilty at times for having opted my own transport. Also for the fact that, i am not a terrorist.

Once in my office cafeteria, I see most common faces, But the best comes, when i visit the restroom, Have got a list of faces, whom i dont meet anywhere else than the rest room area. Luckily, we human still haven't forgotten to say cheese & pass a smile. There is much more than funny things happening here... The reactions are different. A humm that manages to escape the lips when in full song is a real treat to watch. The other kodak moment is when you catch the ugliest staring at the mirror and combing to glory!! Am never visited the HER's room, or i would have a real lot to write in this para.

The next of the funny moment is when i look at people who are senior to me. I somehow, for god damn reason find that they are never intelligent and dig upon stupid stuff to bring out something that may not even be worth looking at. So is that really funny, Nope.. it ain't funny... but frustrating moments..

Now that am no more in chennai, i dont see any clowns and jokers around. But that doesn't mean Bangalore is short of them. Aah.. Except for the last one that i described about the managers., rest all of them, do let me take an off from the normal "thought bag" that i carry.

Cheers!!

Travelogue - Down South!

A sweaty may, Family functions, Friend's functions., all caught up with me travelling.!!

To the amazement, it was all fun-filled memories. The first trip was the usual one. It was not a reply to the question.. "When was the last time, you did something for the first time...", but not late, did i find a reply.

I was brought up outside my hometown, which gave me enough reason not to roam around my place. The far off place that i had been away from home in my state prior to my earlier trip was to a place called Pathanamthitta, the home town of Mr. Lal. That was just for a day, to a friend's place. I was well guided and my friend was along with me. So not much of adventures.

Tell you what, the best comes, when you discover something new everytime, and no wonder why do we s/w people get fed up with our job so soon doing the same job everyday. Make "Changes" constant in life.~~.

The second week of may, was me travelling to a friend's wedding at Trivandrum, which was a good 6 hours journey from my hometown. The best things on earth happen, when you dont have a plan and take it as it comes.!! One needs to be a decision maker of whats going to be next ?

I Could not make it directly to Prasun's wedding from Bangalore as i had to visit few of my friend's place after some family function and also visit a relative who was in the hospital. Saturday Night and i had to head out. Mom threw some tips upon how to go and where to board etc etc. So made a decision to travel night, so that i could reach early morning for the marriage and this was only about a 6 hours drive.

Thrissur isn't a big city, but not too isolated also not to find buses, cabs and auto at 10pm in the night. The city bus stop always had the rush and was in full swing, as it was the weekend. There were people travelling to and fro. The best of things are to see., how lightly or seriously one takes travelling. Without much of hopping around, I decided to board the bus to Trivandrum. Infact, it wasn't trivandrum, it was a place called Attingal, Which is 35kms before Tvm. Thats were i could meet rest of Prasun's friend at the lodge that he had booked and another 10 kms opposite direction to Tvm was the wedding venue. I also had at the back of my mind that i should atleast be able to sleep for 3-4 hours or the next day, i would be dosing to glory or I would have to catch my friend's wedding with a faint eye.

The bus wasn't looking too good to travel in taking the amount of space it had and the seats weren't too comfortable too. Afterall, they were the Kerala Sarkar's Transport Bus. The next option was the train., Thanks to internet and GPRS on the cell phones, Getting information is never tough. Looked out for the next train, it seemed like, There was a train leaving at 11.50pm and it was only an hour away.

So decided to hop on to the train, atleast i would be able to sit & sleep and who travels during the night, it was a train starting from Palakkad to Trivandrum. I'd to spend one good hour of my time, waiting for the train at thrissur railway station, I'd never at that time of hour been to Thrissur. Everytime i tried to dose off, There were Radio FM ads being played..., It used to be like "Ticket Vaangelle?... Enni Radio 105.5 ill ki Tune Cheyyu... Thrissur inte Hit Radio Station.." Whats not commercialized now ? The previous day, when i was watching a friend's wedding DVD, there were representatives from MALABAR JEWELLERY, where the bride picked her ornaments from, with a gift pack. They were dressed in the salesmen's uniform and sported a "Malabar Jewellery" bag. Soon, they would be sponsoring marriages or if not anything, atleast having Ad-Banners in the wedding hall.

11.55pm, and the train arrived. Mine was an open ticket and got into a reserved bogie. I thought of getting in touch with the TC and see if there are any berth's free. After some initial conversations with TC, he said, there were not any vacant seats in that bogie and asked me to try the next bogies. While walking through the inner passages, a policemen halted me. He asked me for my ticket and said, U'll have to alight at the next station and wont be allowed in the reservation bogie as you only have a local open ticket.

I waited till the next station arrives, it was too long since i was standing and had to park my LOT somewhere hence, rested it behind the exit door. You never know where good luck comes from, So this time luck was in the form of another TC, who had 1 empty berth and 3 people, including me waiting to grab it. He seen the other person's ticket and noted that they were together and i was alone. I got the edge and he gave the berth to me. Doesn't that seem to be a story of a slumdog millionaire ? Right from the doors to a berth ? not quite, but had a stint of it.

I tried gathering information from the TC who took to give me the berth, He said, Varkala was the place where i should be getting down to reach this place called Attingal. I put an alarm for 5.00 am and went off to sleep. I never knew how the night passed off.. rather how did the next 4.5 hours pass off.., I opened my eyes to find Quilon and hurried up to get down at the next station.

Varkala came and many like me got down. I had not a clue about what next ? Soon spotted the Exit and was out there. Varkala gave me a warm welcome, a welcome which no places gave me. It was early morning at 5.40 am and there was a temple just outside the railway station. It was playing bhajans, the typical mallu ones. I for a moment wished, i was all clean and dressed in a traditional dhoti, that i could be visiting the temple. On the way out, came across many posters which read about ayurvedic spas and resorts, some resorts sported holiday packages. Just opposite to the temple was a tea stall. A Very very local one. It was an old man running the tea stall and had a buzz of human bees around him pestering him for a tea.

The humans included executives to visitors and policemen. Most of them, looking unfresh from the previous night. But, whatever be the case., I asked him for a light tea, a strong tea would have got my pressure down and i would have really landed up in trouble. The crowd was a little more than than probably he expected, hence there was worry, sense of urgency, all sort of emotions of a human, who sees a well-to-do business. As the buzz was getting harder around his little tea stall, he announced.."Ellareyum, Chaya kodethede vedenollo.." (I shall make sure that everyone gets a tea). While sipping the tea, It was always at the back of mind... "What do i do next... ?", I asked a person beside me, who seemed local to the place and he pointed towards me to the first bus, which was at 6 am to Attingal.

This place was a little more than an half hour drive. The best thing about being on the first bus of the day is... It stops at every temple on the way to give offerings. Thats pretty nice... isn't it ? A good ride, could sometimes sense a cool breeze., probably that was coming from the sea. A good ride, got me to Attingal, where i caught up with Prasun's friends and finally made way to the marriage.

Marriage was superb with the Bride and groom looking amazingly stunning. I dont know if they need to thank me for the lie or their beautician for their artistic job. :P The only surprising thing was., the mantap wasn't facing to the audience but, to the left of the audience. With photographers and relatives covering the view., our Prasun, tied the knot with the consent only of his relatives and close friends and photographers. Thanks to Ansar, We could see the pics clicked by him.

Next came the Sadhya, Be it ocassions or marriages, This pretty afternoon meal is the standout of them all., and that day being no exception. Firstly, its a treat to be between friends and eat teasing and being teased. At some point of time is also when a tension comes in about what to have next ?? The sandya started off with an empty leaves served with different curries to taste and no rice. Once rice comes in, You've to first eat it with Dal, then with Sambar, Then with Curd and then Rasam and then buttermilk. They, then come with different types of Payasams. All in all, a busy 30-45 mins of your life.. :P.

Later, all the friends set back to the lodge, where we were put up and for them, it was the time, where they remembered their old good days and all of them had so much to me tell me. I was listening to many of them first time and till the moment we were done, had an eye of a kid listening to Panchatantra, Sabu & Chacha Chowdary.

All was good, till it was time for me to get to the bus stop to board the bus to Bangalore. Was there only single digit minutes before the departure of the bus or Yes, It would have been me an active part of another "Jab We Met..."

Till next travel....... Dhinu!!

PS : Aps, As i was travelling, I hadn't forgotten to call you, but whenever i tried reaching you, Your cell as usual was unreachable.

Busy May.!!

The post that i last posted was close to a month back., The reason, May was keeping me busy. As busy, that i've never been Courtesy : Marriages.

I wonder what makes people choose MAY as an ideal month for marriage ?. Reason could be many, but i know for sure that i'd been kept busy. The first weekend, was me attending my cousin's wedding. Thankfully, May 1st was an off and was able to make it comfortably. This long weekend reminds me of someone, who had agreed to marry me on a long weekend., But now that she backed away saying May 1st was a working day for her.. I am still open to anyone for another marriage. Dowry matt bhoolna..




So, there we go... A cousin, got married and should say Happily married....



Rajesh Weds Sanitha




Next Weekend came and it was another Marriage...

Prasun Weds Veena

Next weekend too... am travelling, but luckily, there wont be a pic to add under.... Its not for a marriage but for a personal reason.

Happy married life to both the couples...!!!

Till my travelogue comes up!!!!!

Topsyturvey World

What do u do when you when your hearts desire for an ice-cream ? Hmm.. Just walk out to the nearest Baskin Robins or Naturals or even think about not a dedicated ice-cream shop like KFC or a Mac Dy!. Parr, Ab sasura... There is no dedication anywhere.

This weekend, I was longing to hear & see some music, and with the remote in my hand, was pressing the button to find M TV. This was supposed to be Music Television And what do i see... Few Kudiya and mundas revolving around each other spending life together in a so called Splits Villa. Yaar.., yeh splits villa kya hai ?? and the oneliner comes as "Where Love is War.."

Welcome to the ditching world, Here all gals and guys pretend to be in love and caring for each other, but have to once upon a time take decision on dumping each other and firing them off. I am just thinking about this, these kudiyas and mundas are well within 20-25 age range and dont know when are they attending college and work to spend time in all these villas doing nothing than chatofying each other's dimaag.

Evening 7pm, i seen all my room mates coming together to watch Roadies, Saala, yeh bhi M TV pe, and that too letting off go the current IPL. Whats up with roadies ? It seems few hot men and women, would be fighting down to all to become a roadie. With all the badwords from 2 baldies who boasts about god knows what ? Probably about the fact that there is absolutely no hair growth on head & travel in the local trains of mumbai to hear innovative badwords and also a walk down the ulhasnagar, to hear, kaun kiska baap tha....

The other amazement came when an ad came out saying, all hot gals would be missing, rather words, they need 20 chicks who would be travelling around the world in "The Fast & Gorgeous", Where have all the hot gals gone ? Abb kya batau, hot gals dekhne ke liya Formula 1 jaana padega., Yaha tho harr formulae fail ho rahe hai... aur tum Formula 1 ki baat karr rahe ho? Mere M Tv ke bai bhandu, apna channel ka naam change karr ddo.. "Reality Tv" should be ideal. Aur waise bhi, tum log music telecast karte ho, if there would be time away from Roadies, Splits Villa & Fast and Gorgeous..!!

Abb uss din ki baat hi le lo, woh extra innings ki Mandira Bedi, She walked out to the IPL match with towel wrapped around, seems like straight out from shower, naa, maybe straight out from sleep, she wasn't looking fresh from a shower anyway.!! Hum tho soch mein padd gaye the.., is this Cricket game show ya phir Fashion TV ?

Abb iss duniya, gol ghoomte ghoomte, has started feeling giddy, isiliye sabb ulta fulta ho raha hai. Moms often gets a culture shock when her pyaara puttar says, "Mamma, meri shaadi.. meri GF, John se karwa ddo....." Kyon nahi puttar, John nahi tho Abbey Shake Sahi... :-)

Aaj kal, log kaafi creative ho gaye hai., There was a little glitch between us friends about who is going to pay for the treat tonite, All the M Tv fans came up with an Idea, Yeap, Lets go to vote, Whoever wins the vote, has an option to decide, who is going to pay for the treat. Sahi hai beedu!

Abb bacha kya hai ? Poll Dance is still on, I hope duniya ko itni bhi gidiness na aaye ki.., Advani ko Congress ka leader bana de!! Something like IPL Bidding.

Cheers.....

IPL - its all about money, honey!

IPL also called as Indian Paisa League

Figure Facts..
Kevin Pieterson @ IPL2 = 1.5 m$ (Rs. 7.5 Crores for 2 Years)
No. Of Games played at IPL last season per team = 16 (Incase they reached finals) x 2 (years)
Cost Per Match = Rs. 7.5 Cr/32 games = Rs. 23,43,750.

Dhoni
Dhoni @ IPL = 6 Crores for 3 years.
Cost / Match = 12.5 Lks (Just 55% of what KP is earning, Total Loser).

Mr. Chidambaram is already finger licking., Just imagine the tax that he is going to collect on these players ? In other words., Are they really going to be pay taxes ? Thats because Indian Premier League is not being played in India, But in South Africa.

Now, I am not going to show my salary cut off and scare you with the amount that i pay about taxes.

Come next is sony, As we know there is a strategical break, 7.5 mins per innings, Needless to say, the batsmen make strategy on how to get out. So thats 15 mins of Additional advertising.

TRP, Ooops.. Sony of course does have a higher TRP, why would not guys like me take some extra time to watch Extra Innings to see (Mandira Bedi + Short Clothes) ? We also have our mouth wide open towards Post Cards from South Africa.

Adidas + Puma + Reebok = Merchandise Seller at 50% above the normal rate, Not talking too much about the patches with Spice and Nimboos and Odyssey on each of the player's back & arms.

In short..., Its all about money.... H O N E Y!!!

Horror : Re-Iterated

What happens when horror hits again ? Hmm... You would be able to cope up with it., because you have been through it before. Are you guys eyeing towards elections ? Nope. Its about a tamil movie whose hindi version hit the theatres between the busy schedule of IPL (International Premiere League or rather called as Items Premiere league). I'm talking about Dasavatharam / Dasavathar (Hindi) . All you tamilians who are reading this.. Just chill. Keep your ego to yourself till you complete reading this.

Luckily, I was in Chennai to witness all the drama when this movie was released. I was almost hit by the local tamilians when i opposed the movie. These guys were in my office and amazingly, my fellow collegues, did not even to try to save me. Well, Whats all about the movie ? Absolute commercial non-sense flick. Atleast there was no different view between few of my friends who seen this movie and intelligent ones gave this a skip. I had fallen for the hype and few of the reviews that my tamilian friend had to give me.

According to them, this was the master piece! Gosh, if only this is the master piece, Dr. Kamal Hassan has to be re-thinking about World Peace.. Well, what exactly was he trying to prove by portraying 10 different roles ? That too about the roles which hold no importance. He was acted as a 7 feet muslim guy, that was unnecessary, the old lady was unnecessary., for a scene or so, he has acted as Mr. George Bush. Absolute nonsense. This was not really necessary.

On a serious thought, I think the script wasn't written first. Firstly, he decided on the roles that he going to play which would complete "10"avtaars and then found a script which would suit into it. Now, to go with all the 10 roles and grab attention, he also included Tsunami, There was nothing more harder that hit chennai. Few of the movie supporters also said, Tsunami was a blessing in disguise... In that case... Do we really want to have another Tsunami ??

Well, the movie is to watched by hindi cinema audience to be commented on, I too shall watch it as it would be a language that i know, and possibly try to understand all the hidden facts (If at all there is any). Now, step away from the movie and lets walk upto the audience. As i said, I was in chennai, witnessing all the drama. As a part of my lonliness, I opted for the last show at Citi Centre, Chennai. The show began at 10pm and was to go on till 1 am. Amazing, I can push for some speed on my bike then... i thought.!

The first 15 mins, Intresting... Thats only if there was less fight., but being for the state that i am in, Fights and stunts were always in and around them. NO OFFENCE.!!! The movie went on smooth for another 1/2 hour or so, a true commercial flick with Mallika Sherawat around and few scene shot in US, If not for the movie, you could be happy with watching the scenes abroad.

Within no time, i found myself sitting with my hands on my head, Courtesy the movie and the guy who was seated behind me. He was typical tamlian, who was giving a running commentary and also giving some tips to Kamal Hassan on where to hit the guys. The innocence in that beeeeeeeep brought out swearing words from some guy!! Depressing non-sense are these movie halls when it comes to Tamil cinemas. That guy was for sure to be beaten up or atleast removed from the movie hall if this was in some other city.

I could no leave the movie hall in between as the city would be totally empty by that time, had to still wait with my head in my hands till 1 am. Torture at its best. Another friend, slept off during the movie, it seems that the best that he could do. Atleast to sleep in the movie hall for 3 long hours.

If at all, anyone who has seen the movie and understood what kamal was trying to say, please please do explain the concept!!

Awaiting your reviews.....

Vishu... For the lunch it was...

Vishu, Marks the beginning of a Malayalam new year, and accidentally, if not incidentally, I was celebrating it too. This incident quite reminds me of what my German boss had to ask us... "How many New Year Days do you have in a new year ?? ", I'd not quite managed to reply him then, But for now, my answer would be... "Mr. Pages, Welcome to India..."

The traditional way of starting the Vishu day, is by seeing the "Kanni", the first thing in the morning, followed by the elders giving the younger ones a token of gift in the form of money as "Kaineetam". Not to the surprise, I did not have a lender or a borrower, It would have been stupid of me to stand infront of the mirror and do this activity... :P, hence let that go.

Any Ocassion in this Malayalee hindu guy's calendar, would be starting off with going to the temple early morning, Vishu was no different ocassion for not to be visiting the temple and hence, Me woke up at 5 am in the morning, infact it was not so.... i acidentally woke up at 4.40 am and because of the warmth of the season, could not dose off.., hence in the morning hours decided that, i would start the day off by going to temple. Bingo!! the day got a jump start, without having to snooze the alarm, i woke up all by myself.

I was at the temple premises by 5.45am and it had the freshness of the morning beauty., Fresh flowers at the altar, most women wrapped in a white and golden border sari, little girls in white and golden border skirt/blouses and few men in the traditional Malayalee style.. Me as always was different, I was in a jeans and T Shirt (Outstanding people have "OUT"standing position).

The only thing that i dont like about visiting temple on an ocassion day is, the rush!! I can't pray in silence and above all, How many would gods listen to ?? Hence, I did not pray for much, (Even otherwise, my prayers are never answered, only then i am more than poor bank a/c wise). I made way for others who were behind me waiting in the que and luckily i'd got to see a well decorated "KANNI". For all those who dont know what KANNI Means, its a decoration with fruits, vegetables and flowers esp, the Konnapoo (biological name being Cassia fistula).


Soon, I was out of a the temple, where i seen a guy distrubuting pamplets.., It had a note saying that they were offering Vishu Sadhya (the noon meals) @ Kammanahalli with 21 types of curries including 2 types of payasam. Wow, My mouth already started watering and can make up for the little grief that i had not been at home for Vishu.


By then, i had already altered the days plan, I made up my mind to head for the office ASAP and leave office by noon, attend the sadhya and then be at home for the rest of the day. I rode back home, expecting a Tea to make up my morning, it was only 6.20 am and me was waiting at the only little Sai Sagar restaurant that opens at that time, but the scene there was totally different, the restaurant had just opened and the cook and the waiters there were just cleaning up, with a lot of buzz from the newspaper distribution guys all around.

The cashier said, it would take some time for the restaurant to be open and hence asked me to comeback after some time., So i headed to my room and left for office straight away. The day at office looked dull, who would be in office by 7.10 am in the morning, and that too in a office like mine, which starts off by 11.00 am!!, Checked my mails and got myself with a list of things in priority to be completed., luckily there was only 1 task which needed immediate attention. I made sure that it be done well in time before i leave. By 9.30 am, headed for a light breakfast in the Basement Tech Mall @ ITPL, wishing family and friends when walking up and down the office.
Time was ticking by and my friend checking out in between to know where are we heading for lunch, I gave the options of this Kamanahalli place, for which i had got a pamplet, but wasn't too sure as it was a good 20-22 kms drive on a bike in the scortching sun. Moreover, my friend had only 2 hours of permission. Hence, headed out to a restaurant close by!! Luckily, as there were just 2 of us, we immediately got a seat, ahead of people who had come in 8-10s. The lesson learnt... Dont take many people for a treat on an occassional day.



The little sadhya had finally started.... I was served different types of curries on a plantain leaf. It looked fresh and why not? We were sitting down at a restaurant called KAAYAL (The Lake). After a couple of rounds with serving & having most of the delicacies of kerala in the form of puliingi, avial, thorans and so on., It was now time to see what others are doing. Diagonally opposite to my table was a bunch of people sitting down and it was the centre point of attraction. On a day like Vishu, None really opt for Non-veg, during the sadhya atleast. There was a fish fry on that table, huh... not quite there..., I thought. Another surprise hit me when i heard a guy from that table shouting.., "Fork and Spoon Please.." huh.., Are there mallus who eat a sadhya with fork and spoon? Westernization.... what else ?? Or was me just hitting on the wrong end, What if they weren't mallus and were just trying out the sadhya, without knowing the significance of it ?


It was around 1/2 hour that the lunch had started and seen me sitting, already finished with the rice that the waiter had served me with and sipping my sambaram! Another waiter in hurry came upto me and asked, "Anything else sir ??".. How considerate... I thought., I smiled and replied... "Nothing...". He replied back..." Sir, Thank you, Could you please hurry up... There are people waiting..." I looked at him with all the expression that i could give.., that was more because the Sambaram (Buttermilk with green chillies & Ginger and so on) was so spicy. However, I hurriedly sipped it up and I was saying to myself, Maybe these guys found you the king of spice, only then they'd managed to put so many chillies in my butter milk.
So there i was... Almost celebrated the so called "Vishu". Finished off a heavy Sadhya, dropped my friend close to the office and headed back home and headed for a 2 hours nap. It was almost 5pm that i woke up after hearing the next room's person knocking on my room's door to see who is around at an unusual time.

By then, it was time for me to forget that Vishu was already over, I would have to wait another 365 days for yet another day like this...

Wishing all a belated Vishu!!
Lots of Luv,
Dhinu!

No country for old man....

Vote.... Or Shut Up for the next 5 years.

No country for OLD Men...Seems to be the name of an Awaring winning movie, but, Knock knock., you are in India., and Country of Old Men should not be something new to us. We are almost at another verge of handing ourselves to the OLD MEN (Most Uneducated), With a super solid criminal background, who are obese, needs more of sick leaves than annual leaves to rule us.. Yes, Rule us for the next 5 years.

I guess many like me., staying far away from their home town, where they have their voting right, wont be able to make it. Hmm... With the total movement of IT/ITES people across the country, it has become a big issue with the polling and elections, which strangely, none has realised. This time (even with the polls to come)., We are anyways going to be 30%-40% less of voters and these are the voters whose result should actually count.

The reason : Well Educated ones, are responsible enough ones and can put a lateral thinking into what good or bad can be done for the country.

Another 5-10% would have office to attend that day and out of the remaining 50% (Approx), 10% wont go to vote for their laziness and to hide away from the scortching sun.

The Result : We are going to be ruled by a set of people whom, 40% of population voted, another 30% of them under pressure and fear from politicians and the gunda gardi that they have. A mere 1% would be on election duty and luckily their "Vote by Post" may count.

Whats an idea to tackle all this... This is way too out of possibly applying it..

Like almost everyone has Email ID's, We should be having a unique ID to vote too....(I am not sure, if the voting identity card has it). If they can't physically come, they can either Post the Vote, SMS the Vote or email the vote to a specific ID, along with the Unique ID. Sounds too big of a deal, but then, we have been seeing all these kind of voting formats in our reality shows. Can this idea not be made common for a good cause ?

I'm sure, this would be too too tedious task to implement, But strangely, till the time, this kind of system is implemented, We are for sure not going to have a sample data to count on. We would be missing votes of the better best in the country...

Hence, it remains..."THE COUNTRY OF OLD MAN..." sorry about the title above.

Rakhi Sawant Copied me.....



Not quite sure if the queen of nautanki read my blog http://dineshdiwakar.blogspot.com/2009/01/recession-n-me.html
She wants a reality show it seems, thats after reading my post... Seems like there is some atoot bandhan between me and Rakhi, I made use of her name in my previous blog too...

Luv,
Dhinu!

When Kamdev went for a toss.....

Disclaimer : DIL PE MAT LE YAAR.

Not too long ago, was our Kamdev keen on the heavenly dances performed by Urvashi, Ramba and other competitors in the kingdom of heaven. The kingdom of heaven has become the boredom of gods. They are now thinking about an "Out of Box" idea. I heard they've taken off to a an interesting place called "The Earth".

The plan : Have a reality show for replacing Urvashis and Rambas of our coutyard, They're still stuck the classical indian dances, when Rap, Salsa and so on are hot in the Market. Beyond the ozone and cosmos layer lies a flight which is decending, 100 1000 feet per minute. The Destination is the Americas (Including Terminator, All of them have managed to land there..) Seems like thats the gateway to Earth. Now, The reality show is unreal, thats because of their heavenly vision towards the earth, Thanks to the view point, needing no extra dollars for a view.

The landing : Straight to Beyonce Knowles home at Houston, TX, Thats for her dance in the US number-one single "Single Ladies (Put a Ring on It)". Kamdev tried his level best to console Beyonce to fit in for this position., but she wouldn't agree as she doesn't want to be in an Indian heaven, although given the highest regarded post as the one Urvashi was holding... Her take was, I dont know if there's a quota system in those areas too.....

Kamdev, although disappointed never wanted to give up, Wasn't too happy with what Beyonce had to give and hence thought... " Hell with Beyonce, I am afraid about the rest of the list too., as it all seems to be videshi... I shall try it in my home town... ". Took the next available flight from New York - Mumbai (The land of bollywood).. There are few short listed here too.., Aish, Shilpa Shetty, Rakhi Sawant, Sameera are top headed ones... So decided to visit one by one...

Aish to Kamdev: Dont u think, you'd be commiting a crime to take me with you to heavens so soon, I'm just married. Kamdev in return.... I leave you.

Shilpa : Its not even been an anniversary that Raj has gifted me "Rajasthan Royals"... Spare me pls.... Kamdev's heart melted for her too...

Rakhi.. : Kamdev was afraid to ask her..., He gave that a skip...
Sameera : For the intelligent gal that she is (Race, the proof) Yamraaj would be soo tired to come down on his self driven vehicle, In other words, You can come down to our Filimistan, whenever you want and watch enough dances.

Shoot, this case seems to be one like the IT companies before recession, They were in need of candidates all the time.

Kamdev, finally made up his mind to stay back and shall be having all his heavenly dances here. As days passed by, he started getting bored.. Thanks to Farah Khan and Shaimak Davar. They've a lot to train and moreover with these directors who always yelled out "CUT". Our man needed uninterrupted masti, It should be a treat for eyes and thus decided to use the latest technology (the internet) to get his bakt's view about what should be done...

Amazingly the turn out was poor, But thanks to the witty ones, which were very much a reply to the post on his message board. Someone requested him to fly to South Africa in the mid-april. Also, the post owner booked him match and flight tickets... both in the front row.

Not to the surprise, our man was seated right in the front row, right behind where the cheerleaders were dancing., "hmm.... Bakt... Hum kush hue... " I never ever knew such a thing exist, We hardly follow any cricket at heaven" was the reply to the forum.

Now, our bakt wanted to be more impressive, expecting a "Exceed Expectation" rating in his annual appraisal, Replied to the post... "Guruji... I've an idea for you... Why dont you visit us every April, There would be IPL's and with the blessing of Vijay Mallaya, There would be enough cheerleaders on and off...."

With the 100 million pounds idea at the back of his mind, Kamdev returned to heavens to get back his gang to visit the earth during this mid-April. In between all that, this is what happend...

It was "Luck By Chance" that this post was also visited by another bakt, that was in the form of Lalit Modi, He is a big fan of this god., Dont we remember the IPL Shots of him sticking to Preity ? However, Lalit too wants to impress the gods and expect a "EE" in his annual appraisal, hence he gave the ultimate of option to kamdev....

"Lets go for the toss......."


Till Next time,

Luv,
Dhinu

Cricket or Business ??

Everyone would agree with me on their children's future, If I were to give them only options of being a politician or a cricketer. Why not, These two careers are hot in the market and much more at the headlines of every news paper these days.

This morning there was a news reading, our T20 game would be a 10 more longer minutes than the usual 3 hours flat., The reason, There are commercial breaks included for 10 more minutes, Which means, SRK would be repeating, "Wish karo... Dish Karo" for few more minutes, Maybe Shilpa Shetty would have to dance few more times for Rajasthan Royals Promos and Few More Pepsi and Coke ads would make more cricketers work out. This stint is all to fetch the broadcaster nearly $5 million, on the other hand, Cricket as a sport loses. This means, Shaun Marsh would have to hold his emotion of daring to go black and blue and "THE BALAJIs" may have to wait 10 mins to take his Hattrick.

A Simple Calculation
Total No. Of matches Played in 2008

59 x 10 (mins) = 590 Mins (9.8 Hrs),
3 more games could have been watched during the ads time.
3 Bollywood Movies could have been played at the multiplexes.
Approx 10 Hours of unnecessary electricity could have been saved.


Off late, Sony, the official broadcasters for the ongoing India - NZ series asked ICC if they could schedule the match late at NZ, so that there would be many more viewers glued to their Television sets early morning, this resulting to a higher TRP.

Wonder, why are so many business buff's into IPL ? Wonder, why is "INDIAN PREMIER LEAGUE" being played at South Africa? (sounds funny) . Why are cheerleaders brought to the playground, Cricket was played for years and years together, not to find much of change, All of a sudden, so much of change brings too little to the wellness of the game.

Let me not forget the little PAA-Ji (Kapil), His brain behind ICL was probably the Door to Money Minting for ICC.

Be whatever, We all follow what the world follows, so dont think much, Just enjoy IPL 2009.

I'm in for MUMBAI INDIANS minus Sachin Tendulkar.

Wireless Communication....

Oops... seems like am still answering my papers..., Yes, This was a topic that i could be tested upon. Nevertheless, we are so familiar with this word now, We are in the e-age.... isn't it ?

My eyes caught a gentle lady, totally decorated (alias for makeup) Wearing a black skirt, red top, looking straight into my eyes and saying "Damn, You're the most insane creature on earth", I asked her, "how the hell did you know about it..., its just between my friends", when she once again adjusted her bluetooth to repeat the same words again.

What would have been my mistake, even if i were to get mad at her, and for that reason, even slap her ? She was on a Wireless Communication Mode. Hmm.., The worlds like Effective Communication and stuff are far far away now, I even see corporate rolling out Communication Etiquette. The Do's and Dont's when on a call etc etc., This was not how it was before, We could hear people scream at the top of their voice on a STD call and make sure that they called up STD calls only in the night hours.

Well, Lets have a snapshot on how communication used to be...
1800 AD : Probably the age of Tarzan, The Communication used to be understood in waves and frequencies. All of their sounds carried different meaning.

1980's : Much matured, Phones were wired, but hardly made any use, as it is, there were not much people with phone to call. That made mom's to scream "Bablooo" and "Chintooo" to get their kids back home after their evening play time.

1990s : BSNL/MTNL (Mera Telephone Nahi Lagta) was much more in picture, when they had enough telephone lines rolled out.

Late 90's Early 2000 : BF to his Gal...
a. When I start from home, I shall buzz you thrice.
b. When i reach the nukkad of the building, I shall buzz you twice.,
c. Dead Line for the gal to shoo off any guys who had been revolving/rotating beside her... I shall give you a single ring when i am down your building.

Off Late : None of them have the patience to buzz one/two or one and half even, People have even forgot "hi", "hello", "how r u", Often.. The call starts of with "Bol".. Thanks to the Caller ID facility.

Tell you what, There are few instances, where we still switch back to the age of tarzan, Oh yes, I experienced it myself for minutes before boarding a bus to Bangalore last weekend.

A local man at Guruvayoor bus stop @ kerala, In the best of FORM that he could be, shouting at the top of his voice to raise his concern about what Guruvayoor needs the most..... Hmm.., being not being a native of this place, I did not know how badly is it required there....

But his ONLY demand was....
TO MAKE URINARY FOR LADIES AT THE BUS STATION........

Thanks to Wireless Communication, If not the authorities, At least people waiting at the bus stop could hear him, LOUD and CLEAR

Yeh Kaisi Zindagi.

Epilogue :-
This blog is dedicated to all my friends who are married, and also to their wives who are defenitely married ;). This blogs reaches out to all uncles, aunties and not to forget my friends who are soon going to be married.

Also, A special note of thanks to my friend., who inspired me to turn out my idea into blogs., The worst of her , triggered close to the best of me.

Disclaimer :-
This is Imaginary, Any resemblance to the dead or alive is truly fictional /coincidental....

Wife : Aaji Sunte ho... Zara mera watch drawer se nikaal dena please.., I'm running late honey....
Husband : Not bad..., My bus comes earlier than yours and you are running late, God help.., Anyways here it is., Mein chalta hoon... Shaam ko milte hai sweety....

(On the way from the bedroom to the drawing room, He has a snapshot of his day, Market Watch, Cricket Match, Boss ki Secretary kiss color ka skirt pehni hogi.. etc etc.. )

The Scene at the drawing hall... (Mom, MIL Wife ki.., Sitting in the drawing hall, browsing through the news paper...)

Husband : Maa ji.. Aashirwaad ddo, Office jaa raha hoon., Hope ki company bus miss naa ho jaye....

Maaji : Very Filmi (Thanks to the soaps on Star Plus), Jeete raho puttar.... Worry not, Maa ka aashirwad hamesha tumhare saath hai..... Waise tumhara shirt itna crumpled kyon hai ?


Husband : Maa.. Iron karne time nahi mila.... Abb bass theek hai.... Mein chalta hoon...
(Husband says alvida and off he goes to board his 7.20 am shuttle).


The scene.... Mother In Law is still browsing through the newspaper when Bahu comes out, Bahu is all fuming with anger over many things..., but unlike her frustration, she is still dressed in the best of her business executive formals, Wearing a hard red lipstick, and getting her handbag organised by stuffing her lipstick, ID card, comb, mirror and tissues (Those thinking otherwise,.. give a break), I meant facial tissues.

Maaji : Bahu....
Bahu : (Whispers) Shits (Dimag ka salad hua pada hai, aur yeh ek hai, jo kabhi peecha hi nahi chodthi..)... Ji Maaji..
Maaji : Aaj koi meeting hai kya ? Ghar lautthe late ho jaoge kya ?
Bahu : Ji haan maaji.., Aaj client side pe meeting hai.., parr 7 baje tak pahuch jaaongi...
Maaji : (Who was sitting with paper all these while, Puts the paper beside..) Beta.., Tumhare pati ka shirt dekha ? Ek dum crumpled tha.... Tum kuch karti kyon nahi ?
Bahu : (Pissed) Kya karu maa ji... Office ka kaam... Ghar ka kaaam... time hi nahi milta....
Maaji : (Upset) Beta, woh tumhara pati hai..., aur tum dyaan rakhna chahiye inn sabb cheezo ka !!
Bahu : Maaji.., itni busy rehti hoon ki muje time hi nahi milta... (sniffs)
Maaji (irritated) : Aise kaise keh sakti ho bahu... Mere bete ne tuje shaadi kiss liye kiya ?
Bahu (totally blown off) : Agar aise bahu hi chahiye thi.... tho maaji.. aapko bahu nahi.. naukraani rakh leni thi...
Maaji : Yeh kya jawab hua., tumhara responsibility hai... tumhe hi karni padegi....
(Hmm... The only thing thats standing out from the real life and soap is the background music)
Bahu : Mere paas time nahi hai.... Aap ko agar itni icha hai yeh sabb karne ki... tho aap unka shirt iron karr leti.....
Maaji (mann mein) : Itna rubab ?, Dekaati hoon shaam ko.... Waise bhi aaj maid ka chutti hai., mein dekti hoon baahu aaj kaise khana nahi banati hai...

Evening Scene :-
Our patidev is all tired returning from office to the warmth of home and the cuddleness of his one and only wife and the saaya of his beloved maaji exactly at 6.50 pm with a terrible headache, wanting a strong tea to drive away all the 'Takaan' that he mehsoosed at work.

Scene at the drawing room.

The big needle of the clock trying hard to reach 7, and maaji deep in prayers, not because she is having so much to pray, but to make sure that bahu starts cooking as soon as she comes in at 7 pm.

Patidev uses his spare key to open the door from outside., What he finds inside is, the dog has messed up, Newspaper scattered all around the drawing room and the floor is just untidy, when he remembers..., "Shit.. the maid didn't turn up today..."

Nevermind, Dont bother mom, and he starts collecting the newspaper and arranging them, cleans up the dogs mess and heads for a shower, Wishing to have a hot strong chai but ended up nowhere, now his wait is for dinner at 9, Watch TV & Chit chat with the family and off to bed at 10 pm., Schedule seems workable.

Suddenly a voice from nowhere...,
Maaji : Beta....,
Beta : Haan Maa Ji...
Maa : Tum bahu ko samjaathe kyon nahi ? Usse kaho, woh maid se sirf ghar saaf karaye, aur khana woh khud hi banaye.
Beta : Ji Maaji (Still unaware of what happend between saas and bahu in the morning)
Maa : Bahu tho.....
Beta (Interrupts) : Maa... mein naha karr aata hoon....

Maa has got things on her nerves now, Dekha, Pehle woh mera saara baat, baitkar sunta tha, abb uske paas apne maa ke liye bilkul waqt nahi hai... Bass.., Biwi ke pallu ka saaya kya mila, Maa daa laadla poori tarah bigad gaya.....

Patidev, After his power is almost over, checks in for a shower, comes out fresh (charged), but not charged enough to see the bed and not lie for a moment, so he unwantedly crashes and dozes off... Just as he was about to catch sleep, he wakes up, sees the time, it was 8.45pm and rushes to the drawing hall, Mom is still praying and our patidev is perplexed, Mom suchmuch itni der se pray karr rahi thi ?

Patidev aka beta (Confused) : Maa.., aap ko ho kya gaya? tabb se pray karr rahi ho ? Ghar pe sabb teek thaak tho hai naa ?
Maa : Mere se baat matt kar nalayak, mein thodi der pehle bedroom aaya tha, aur tu sone ki natak karr raha tha...
Patidev (Still confused) : Maa... mein sachmuch so gaya..., bass bahut takaan thi...

This is the exact moment when Bahu checks in...., She has had her dinner outside when she went on a client visit and our maataji is fasting, she drinks only milk in the night and our Patidev-Beta is HUNGRY....

Maaji : Bahu, Yeh koi waqt hai..., tum tho 7 baje aane waali thi na? (She's concerned about the time that she started off with her prayers and unfortunately had to stretch THIS long....)

Bahu: (looks @ patidev) Hello Ji.... (turns face towards Maaji) and says.. Maaji.., thodi si late ho gayi thi..., Socha aapne unke liye khana banaya hoga aur mein bahar se dinner karke aayi...


Maaji : Tum hi tho kehti thi ghar pe busy rehti tho..., Tho socha khana tum aakar bana logi..


Patidev (mann mein...). Shits.., Aaj bhi bhooka sona padega.... :'(. He had had enough of it now and knows that he is soon going to experience another episode of Saas-Bahu war, doesn't utter a word and goes back to the bed room...


In the fights of hers, Its just me who loses. Its only me who gets sandwiched.

I hope raat ko atleast biwi, muje diet karwake, bhooka nahi sulayegi........


Note :- This note was a part of Deja Vu that i had when thinking abt life after marriage.